It came over me suddenly, a deep feeling of frustration, sadness and anger. The joy and fun of the last week was immediately blown away from my mind as the last punishments were done cruel and painful. I died a couple of times in most horrible ways and mostly alone when i am remembering right. The dissed and brain fucked wardens, clients and staff-members were partially annoyed or pissed off and made their anger feel.
Facing the disquieting situation i asked for a demotion or at least to be locked in the cages again. To calm the waves this seemed natural for me in this moment.
Frustrated i locked myself in the cells whenever i woke up at the club. Since no many visitors, clients or staff members were around i was mostly alone and isolated for many hours during the day.
Only for being abused, tortured or killed i left the dirty cold cage. And that happened more often as i thought before.
The treatments were hard as mostly and i had to suffer a lot in several forms. Electro-shocks were given to my mouth, breasts and sex until i died rattling and smoking.
But also my breasts were hammered and perforated by pins before the cruel tormenter decided to rape my ass while i was pinned painful to the bench on which i was cuffed.
Another brutal guy sliced up my breasts and cut them off before he stabbed and shoved his sharp knife into my sex and ass for fucking me with it.
After a while of horrible pain and much bleeding my senses faded and gladly i had not to experience the last fuck the man did on me.
While my body died, my mind was wandering around in the silent oppressive depths of my frustration and depression. Long dark and lonely corridors of thoughts and doubts.
I felt being in a tight corner, battered and punished by the consequences of my hilarious former acts and manners. My mind and thoughts were affected and marbled by anger and despair.
Sir Bremen yanked me out of my capsuling for a bit as he did his painful whippings and cattle-prod treatments while i was cuffed to a cross.
So i was able to repress the memories of my mental suffering for a few hours and had to bear with the agony my hurt body hammered in my mind.
But there was always a dark gap after each treatment and torture and it pulled me down in the gorge of depression and intensified the loss of lust to stay mental present during the further sessions i was forced to experience.
Passive i watched the doings and happenings on the patio. Sir Iezious came up with a bundle of cruel ideas and i saw Rya again struggling in some trouble as her rebelling mind was showing up as usual.
The "princess" theme was already around although in my case this topic was gone.
I felt absolutely NOT like a goddess or similar while my brain got tormented by stupid depressive thoughts again and again.
As my bad mood was obvious to nearly all people around, Sir Alvise decided to help me with his own methods. I was pretty sure that this would not mean help in the usual sense.
I was brought to Miss Shani´s new house on the beach behind the barn and tied to a post in her living-room. Alvise amltreated and molested Shani first a bit and while hanging on the wood i listened to a few screams from the outside. A heated blade was used and the given pain was obvious.
Nervous and with trembling body i waited what Sir Alvise had in mind for helping me out of my depressed and sad situation.
Then my belly and left breast got scorched by a glowing heated knife. Especially my nipple got injured heavily by that painful treatment and during that i had for sure no space to think on my frantic mood.
Sir Alvise was not really happy with his therapy in the end but wanted leave me with a smile on my face. So he used his blade, carved and sliced left and right of my mouth with it.
Miss Shani released me then from the post and i was able to stagger away in the medical room to repair and heal my hurting bleeding injuries. After that i needed badly a break from the island and started one of the staff´s helicopters to fly at Southside Snakepit.
Of course i was pretty fast in new trouble there and had a further chance to come over my formally so bad feelings and frustration.
Back at Glass´n Stone House i met Sir Dunnagh, he quit his job as warden and is now a highly regarded client at the club. We talked a bit about my latest affections since i noticed that my friend Gera, Dunnagh´s wife, got worried about the shocking life i have to go through.
The more i observed my situation and the more i wrote down my experiences, moods and thoughts, the more i felt better in some sense. My anger and parts of the frustrating, humiliating feelings are still hurting my mind but in general my fate seems to be bearable again.
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